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October 27, 2004

One Nation - Retarded
RetardA liberal is a retard. All liberals are retards. Because a liberal ain't nothing but a retard.

No one calls himself a liberal, or at the very least, very few people identify with being a liberal. Conservatives identify themselves as conservatives. Many identify with being black, or Irish, or Catholic, or gay, but very few stand up to be identified as liberal.

The big difference is that conservatism is pretty proactive, meaning people purposely define themselves as conservatives. They vote conservative. They protest anti-conservative policies. They proactively participate in the many things that define their conservatism.

At one point liberalism was pretty similar. But it just isn't the case today. Present-day liberals are sort of thrown together, forced into a lumped classification. White liberals don't fight for black issues. Black liberals don't fight for gay issues. Gay liberals don't fight for liberal issues, unless it includes gay rights.

Southern whites don't understand Northern whites. Northern blacks don't get southern blacks. And we sort of all hate the faggots. We just don't like saying that shit aloud. Unfortunately, liberals don't really like themselves. Which is completely unlike conservatives.

I've always wondered if conservatives identify themselves more as conservatives than Americans. If it came that a conservative had the choice between saving a Frenchman, or a liberal American, which person would live to breathe another day? I kind of believe there's a pretty good chance they both might end up as worm food. But that's just me. Who knows?

Conservative self-love, or better yet, liberal self-hate can't all be blamed on the liberal. Liberal is unfortunately too broad a term to define so diverse a class of people. And it's too bad that conservatism is too exclusive a club. Not everybody can get in.

It's also too bad that liberal has become so shameful a word. But no one should be surprised. Doesn't liberal simply mean nigger when spoken by a conservative? Whites can't call themselves whitey. And goddammit, nigger's taken, and you can't have it back.

In a much less offensive tone, maybe we should identify liberal with feminist. Feminist are liberal, not to say that there aren't conservative feminist. But feminism isn't exactly identified with conservatism.

Because when someone calls you a feminist, we all know that they might as well have said hairy ass, bull dyke, fat nasty, greasy ass, slutty whore, because that's what it means to be called a feminist. Because no one calls a woman a feminist unless they say it in a very clinical way, or if they mean it to identify, label, possibly degrade someone in a very pointed way.

The person saying it might as well have called the woman, Miss Butch Dyke Slutty America 2004. Give thanks for the honor.

And people wonder why women haven't claimed the word as their own. Unfortunately, it's been co-opted, any original meaning stripped from its true definition. Much like being a liberal. Or better yet, a retard. See what I did there. Forget it.

A mentally retarded man stands on the street. You say Hey, retard, what's it like being a retard. Not that I would say anything offensive like that. Or you would either. But let's just say something like that happened.

And the mentally retarded man says adamantly that he isn't a retard, even though, partially, he is. Retard is only short for retarded. So basically, the retard is a retard.

But would you honestly expect a retarded man to identify himself as a retard? Would you honestly expect him to jump up and say, That's me, good ole' retard. Actually he might, because, you know, he might not understand that you're making fun of him. But you get my point.

The retard, like the nigger, or the Negro, or the colored man, or the black man, or the African-American, is unfortunately placed in the position of recreating self definition, an acceptable identification for himself, by himself (F.H.B.H.?) so that others will define him in a more accurate and personal light, an act so incomprehensible, self-conscious and ultimately narcissistic, no wonder people scoff and ridicule when forced to use the newly created terms.

It would seem the only way to escape such ridicule is to never be forcibly defined in the first place, which seems ultimately impossible. At one point in history, weren't we all simply men. And has the definition of a man changed so that we were forced to define ourselves as something greater, or lesser by my estimations.

I mean, hasn't complex definition only led to self-imposed separation, and greater communal degradation, something that is so abhorred by our American identity.

I don't know. Whatever.
posted by Doc Savage | Link |

Blogger Byron said...

Maybe you should leave that weed alone for a while.

3:28 AM  

Blogger Doc Savage said...

More weed, my brotha. And less beer.

5:16 PM  

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